bookoverflowers | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

[if he's being honest with himself, he's still angry. accepting, but angry. so there's no music coming out of boys' 21 today, just silence. rui is curled up on the bed, reading, and waiting for a knock he's still not sure is going to come]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[he'd have been here before breakfast, even, if he'd been able to think of what to say, but he waited til noon in case you slept in. he raps at the door once, lightly, before deciding WHAT A PATHETIC KNOCK and trying again more firmly]

[that weak little knock is what keeps him from startling at the louder one. he puts the book down and sits up]

It's open.

[lets himself in, then, shifting the paper bag he brought and still isn't sure will be welcome, much like himself]

Ah... Hello, Rui.

Yo.

[he doesn't move, but he does gesture for ryuu to sit]

[just puts the bag down on a table instead of handing it over, because there are more important things to do right now, like park his butt like he was signaled to]

Do you understand why I'm angry?

[acknowledging that puts another drafty hole in the pit of his stomach, but he manages not to flinch]

I didn't... consider you.

Not like a person. Like a thing.

I'm not whatever you think I am.

[brings himself to blink at the ceiling for a moment]

I keep making that same mistake. I don't even notice.

You're too busy not liking yourself to think about anyone else.

...

... Hm. I shouldn't assume things about anyone just because I can't.

Because you can't what?

[glares stubbornly ahead at a wall]

I can't bring myself to come up with a reason why they don't see what I see. And then they end up hurt, and I feel like I should have warned them in advance, but I don't want to be by myself, either.